Ever looked up to the sky and wondered what’s up there? Of course I know there’s a lot of stars and planets, and that moon and his buddy the sun. But, like have you ever asked yourself the questions that you and I could never answer about our special universe? Then unrelentlessly, your conscious sometimes battles that uneasy feeling when you almost question your beliefs about your own existence as well as everything and everyone around you. The what ifs and maybes that try infiltrate your thought process seem to get put on loudspeaker.
The biggest battle I ever had with myself was not really about my own personal advancement in this world; I almost never cared about my outcome in life at one point, but it was more about what and who is life. Epiphanies stormed out of me on that specific day. Almost had that, ‘I figured it out’ moment. I actually had more of a b***h slap moment from life herself, and that’s where I cared a bit more for my own personal advancement. No matter how beautiful this world is, I realized that life doesn’t care about you. Life is on the same roller-coaster ride like everything else spinning together on someones’ axis until the sun bursts in five billion years. We can blame inertia for that.
What’s the prompt? I looked up last night. Saw the stars, felt the air rush in and out of my lungs like a thief in the night. The sudden chill that creeped up my spine thanks to the funny rain weather this past weekend. The moon, half black and half yellow, glaring back at me and waiting patiently for something. The sun maybe? Who knows? But, at that moment in time I was in a trance of somewhat. I can’t really explain how I felt but, the theme was just a sense of disbelief at the beauty of this world; the same world that has an expiry date. There’s generations to come before that but, imagine the generation that has to experience this demise? Scary right? Now you definitely going to stick to something; God or man.
Life seems to be throwing us more lemons of late. Famine, war, inequality, natural disasters, corruption, death, death and more death. In my opinion death is a part of life. Like we have seen for many years that something starts and breathes life will eventually shrivel and cease to exist. So it comes as no surprise to me that, just as the universe will be the chief instigator of its own demise, so will the human race considering the way we still continue to hate each other. [Insert thinking emoji]
I released the last unforced sigh of awkward relief and made my way back into the apartment. It was 3am and I was too far gone to continue this brainstorming tirade. So, have you ever looked up to the sky and wondered what’s up there? I certainly have.
I drank a glass of cold water and drowsily made my way back to bed.
It was warm beside her. Inertia.
Photo Credit: Beth Tate